Birthday ideas for Abhishek Bachchan

• Gift him an exact replica of the Padma Shree Award. This will ease egos at home

• Gift him shaving cream, that stubble just makes him look like a wannabe Ranvijay

• Send him to Dr. Watsa for sexual counseling :P

• Tell him how PETA found Aishwariya's "Pink Panther" offensive

• Gift him 6 maps of Delhi

• Spread some daanas where he parks his car, the kabootars will do the rest

• Challenge Abhishek to a sword fight

• Ask him if he's seen luck by chance, by any chance

• That's not a birthday gift. It's just generally a good conversation starter

• Anyway, while you are having that conversation, please also ask him what 'masakalli' exactly means

• Crank the volume up at his birthday party and have the cops raid it

• That will be complete celebrational attayachaar